Chapter 6.   Pimps up! Poets Down!

Is it possible for 'community' events & organizations respect the entire community and not go bankrupt?

Pimpin’ ain’t easy. But that doesn’t stop anyone from trying to do it.

I’m used to promoters trying to get over on poets. If you’re out there hustling you know what I mean: I’ve got this gig coming up and I think the people could really benefit from what you do. You know, a little consciousness for the masses – besides poets are hot right now. I can’t pay you, but there will be a couple hundred people there and it will be really good exposure for you. And if you have folks that want to come, tickets are $50. By the way, can you hand out some flyers, too?

Thus the nature of the game until poets learn to respond with a big fat hell no and keep on stepping. (Exposure? Wait a minute. If you came to find me, what does that tell you about my exposure level? Umm… thanks for the free shout out, but can a sistah pay rent, please?)

But recently, I decided to touch-up on my long-forgotten acting skills. Took a class; redid my headshots; revised the resume and kept my eyes open for opportunity only to find that…

… poets aren’t the only folks out there getting pimped. And the better P.I.M.P.s like to use the word ‘community’ in every other sentence.

I received notice of a casting call from a new network that I shall not name which is bank rolled and promoted by an independently wealthy man who I shall not name. (Because libel is expensive and exposure won’t help pay off the lawsuit either.) So I click on over to the website. This network is casting for several shows, requiring several different ages, personalities and talents in all shapes and sizes (supposedly). There is a nice celebrity endorsement of the network along with promises that famous folk and good advertisers are already on board. There are no details, however. Nothing about what to bring to an audition or what an audition consists of or what roles in particular are available. If you want that kind of information, you have to call the telephone number. It’s a 1-900 number. It costs $2.95 a minute for you to get the information you need to audition.

Now that’s gangsta.

Let me add a few caveats here before I put these folks on blast. There is a difference between your everyday struggling i-wish-i-was-marc-barnes-type promoter and your previously self-made millionaire who has gotten bored or ego-docious and now wants to be in the limelight 24-7.

As an indie artist, I have participated in many conversations about how many of the struggling promoters neither respect, encourage or pay their artists (and that’s why they are struggling). These folks range from just asking you to perform for free all the way to asking you to pay a fee in order for them to evaluate whether or not they want to ask you to perform for free. I’ll play the devil’s advocate and say that many of these wanna-be’s are not necessarily evil-money-grubbing artist abusers, but rather folks who simply don’t understand their full responsibilities – like maids who don’t do windows. And let’s face it: maids who don’t do windows get hired every day. Artists understand that more often than not, in the beginning (and sometimes during the middle), you will get played and not paid and the best you can do is try to use the situation to your advantage. We lay in wait and savor those moments when we can smile at Mr. Man crookedly when he has to admit that the artist he didn’t pay is the one who saved his sorry little show.

But I digress.

The reason that this network’s casting call has warranted an issue of INDIE LIFE is because of phrases like: “We’re different from others because our mission statement and commitment to the community are different.” They are promoting themselves as the violence and sex-free network that will uplift the urban – yes, of course this is an urban-targeted station – family. I will skip the fact that some of the ‘original’ shows are downright trite and uninspired. I will bypass the predictable celebrity profiling. I will even overlook all the pitches attempting to entice Corporate American advertisers that want to reach an urban *sigh* market.

It’s their shortsighted use of the word community that gets me. As my fellow-poet friend Tara Betts says: Somebody needs to get a vision.

The whole nature of indie artistry is one of community. No record deal. No sponsorship. No PR chick or A&R rep. Just you, a microphone, and the people who love you. It’s the community that keeps us in business. The wisest among us stay very very connected to the community that gave us our $5-a-show-start. This is how you go ghetto-gold. Integrity is expensive. And no one seems to want to pay you for not selling out.

So when a network comes along supposedly “committed to enhancing the lives of youth and steering them away from drugs” but doesn’t realize that it’s those very youth they are charging three bucks a minute to get put on, I get a lil’ riled up.

Here are your choices: pay somebody $15 (figure a 5-minute phone call) to consider listening to you talk about revolution and changing lives, or just singing innocuous feel good music; or get paid $15 an album for talking about bitches and ho’s, sex and how many times you got shot are willing to get shot or probably will shoot in the very near future if your competition doesn’t get out of your face.

Okay, so I’ll split the difference and sing my revolutionary-life changing-feel-goods for free as long as the phone call booking me is free too.

But not everyone has the luxury of being righteous. What if it’s less about the revolution and more about bringing home enough money so your momma doesn’t have to trick? What if it’s less about changing other people’s lives and more about pulling together enough money to get your family out of the hood so they can just live. What if you aren’t even aware of the choice because the true gangsta’s are knocking on your door for free, but those coming to redeem your sad urban life are charging you the $3-a-minute that you don’t have just to hear the message?

But maybe it isn’t as deep as all this apocalypse now! philosophizing is making it out to be. Perhaps our salvation is still on the way.

Maybe some kid rapper/singer/poet/actor out there is another soon-to-be self-made millionaire who will one day have enough money to bank roll his own network. And when he gets that kind of money he’s going to make his network a community-saving network that will uplift lives and save the good urban families. But in the meantime our soon-to-be-self-made millionaire is going to follow the lead of our current network-owning-self-made millionaire and get with the money trail. He’s going to make money, not spend it, right? So we’ll be seeing our young soon-to-be-self-made millionaire getting paid for his foul-mouthed-spirit-killing-misogynistic bullish on MTV and not on self-made-millionaire-community-saving-TV.

At least this way our soon-to-be-self-made millionaire won’t get pimped by our already self-made-community-building millionaire. It’s just unfortunate that the rest of us will.

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JH